Clouds of Thought!

I am thinking about many things at once tonight. I am thinking that on this day 8 years ago, my grandmother died. She was the only grandma of me considerably. Ok I will explain. I still have my mothers mother. We don't get along. Never have, never will. Even as a small child we have never connected. To me she is a very controlling, two-sided, bitter existance. She thinks her thoughts and makes them known without thought of whose feelings are being hurt. The whole side of the family is in turmoil and the root of all the evil is her. A few years ago, my grandpa died. He was the only grandpa I had ever had blessing of meeting. At his death, I felt no loss, no feelings at all. I questioned my feelings, but never fully understood. I just was without feeling. As the years go by I understand more and realize that truley missed a magnificent man. His glory was blocked by a 5 ft tall dark woman. Anyway back to my grandma Edith. She was always so kind and i loved visiting her. I can remember my dad bringing me and my sister there to have coffee with her on Sunday mornings. I remember going there every christmas eve. It was wonderful. She was always so poor and we had the best time. I remember going to the other family every Christmas morning and waiting and waiting to leave. To this day I still miss her. I got married a month to the day before she had died. My grandpa Albert, her husband died a month to the day before I was born. I wish I could have met him, and I wish that I could have my grandmother her in my life today.

Just some cloudy thoughts, with a bit of rain!